Gratitude...

Now i am taking a go at close-ups! It is tons of fun. I took the boys outside with me yesterday and we found these flowers to take pictures of. The butterfly in the second picture was a very tiny butterfly, probably the size of my thumbnail. We had fun searching together for pretty plants. Life is so good right now. I am trying to take in every moment! My life has been full of trials and hard times, as i am sure everyone has had to deal with. It has been such a consistent thing that once life is without them for awhile i get scared because i am like "This can't last forever. Something else is gonna happen, and i just don't know what it is." Don't get me wrong. I don't live in fear everyday. I realize that i need to take advantage of every moment. I just want life to be the way it is right now, forever! :) No tears, no hurting, no trials, no disappointments, no sadness, anger, etc. Unrealistic i know. Life is full of those all the time. Of course every month i have my own issues for about a week....you know....that time of the month. I get EXTREMELY irritable. It drives me nuts that i get so irritable! I try avoiding people during that time. :) I am going on the IUD soon and i HOPE that will help my irritability issues! :) Am i giving too much information? Oh well. That's me. Yes, you heard me right...the IUD. So that means we aren't planning on anymore kids for awhile. Yup. We thought we would have 5 kids, and we thought this before we actually had kids. With time brings change. :) We LOVE our boys, but we also know what we can and can't handle. Everyone is different. Aside from that, i am sure we will have one more when we are done with school. Just not now. :) Anyway, Life has never been better for me. I am sooooo happy with where i am at in life. I LOVE my husband more than anything. He is such a strength to me in so many ways....in ways that i realize more and more and wasn't able to see, but am now starting to see. He is the best. Exactly what i need. My boys bring me such joy, lots of hard times, but lots of joy! :) Anyway, i realize i am blabbing, but i also realize not many read this so it's okay that i am blabbing. I just feel so much gratitude right now for everything in my life. I am just taking in every moment. Living in the moment. In my younger years i was really good at not taking others advice. But now i try really hard to take others advice, especially when it comes to my kids. I don't want to live with regrets. I hear so many parents of kids who are now out of the house say, "oh they grow so fast. enjoy them while they are young." "If i had to do it all over i would be the best mom there is." "Oh, enjoy every moment because they grow so fast and these moments right now are the best days of your lives." I try so hard to remember that when i am about to get upset over something silly. Of course i still get upset, but keeping that in mind really helps me. I try to picture myself down the road and i want to be able to say, "I was the best mom i could've been. I soaked in every moment and enjoyed my kids." I want my kids to feel so safe and secure in their home. I want them to know that their family is their safe place. Their family are the one's they can TRULY trust, are the one's that will ALWAYS be there whenever life gets hard or difficult or life seems to disappoint. They NEED a safe and secure place to turn and that NEEDS to be their mom and dad and siblings. I want that for my kids more than anything. I want them to ALWAYS feel sooooo loved. They are my precious treasure. They are a gift from God. Anyway, i am done for now. Until next time...